Saturday, February 21

Pool of blood under the nail

I reached into my pocket for something, but still had a book of checks in that pocket from going to the PayDay loan place and the ring finger on my left hand throttled straight into an outsticking staple from the checks. Went right into the place between your finger and nail, like where the american military shoves the needles when they are torturing you.

Very painful and a little pool of blood formed under the middle of my nail.

That's all.

Sunday, February 15

Bang!

Humans love make believe.



via boingboing

Monday, February 9

Dungeon 3 and 4: owned, Dungeon 8 found!

Killed the crab clam thing with the bomb in level 3 super fast and found the raft pretty quick. I seem to always be finding the boss before the item. A few months ago when I was really drunk I got stuck on dungeon 4 forever but this time it went pretty quick, but I had to do some grinding beforehand. I bought my candle, and got the silver sword (is it the master sword? I can't remember, I just know I have to go to the cemetery to make it stronger), which now that I think of it I probably didn't get it last time which is why I couldn't beat the 2 headed monster. This time I did, yay!

Also got another heart container using the ladder, and burned down some trees to get some extra money. I used that money to buy arrows which I thought I needed to kill the dungeon 4 boss, but apparently I didn't. Also, some old man made me pay for his door. Your door is a tree? Fucking boomers.

Then I found level 5 (which I had no idea where to find until right after I finished level 4 and then it just popped in there) and got to the boss but he's a little floating yellow thing and I don't know what to do. Bombs? I don't have any bombs. I'm always running out of bombs.

Oh damn, I think you got to use the flute on him. Yeah, that's it. Gotta get me a flute. And I JUST now remembered that the flute opens up level 6 and 7.

Oh yeah, and I stumbled across level 8 when I was clearing brush. It's like in the easy section of the map. I did NOT remember that. How the fuck did I find this shit when I was a kid?

2nd dungeon: ass kicked

Okay, so one bomb took care of the triceratops and now I have HIS triforce. I did the entire dungeon in like 2 minutes, is this a child's game or something!?

I had a much harder time trying to figure out where the hell that goddamn little fairy was in the forest. I SORTA knew, but looked for freaking forever until I found her. After I found her I went back and killed the 3 goblin guys in the dungeon for the silver boomerang, which is pretty sweet since it kills wimpy bad guys, but it was hard to get because they have these gargoyles shooting balls of energy at you and then a bunch of goblins attacking you with boomerangs.

That's why I needed the fairy to give me all my hearts back.

Oh, and that eastmost peninsula thing? It's either that dumb gambling place or I need the raft to get a heart thing.

Replaying this game after 20 years is fun. It's like I have mild ESP. I don't know where anything is, but I sorta have a sense of where it might be. I'll be like passing a screen and go, "Hmm... I don't know why, but I think I should place a bomb around here." And then I do! And then a one eyed goblin gives me money and tells me it's a mystery to everyone.

Touche, one eyed goblin. Touche.

Wow, dragon, guess you didn't wan't to keep that piece of the triforce that bad, did you?

Legend of Zelda, dungeon 1: defeated

It's that cute, green dragon who shoots 3 energy balls at you at a time and has absolutely no defenses. I got the boomerang, and a bow, and some bombs. I hate the bombs because whenever I forget to take them off as my second item I always end up blowing myself up. But I still have them. Now I'm off to check out the east most peninsula or some shit. I think it's a heart or something, I forget.

I also can't remember the location of the second dungeon.

pee pee poo poo the economy is in the toilet

It's fucking cold outside and a local blog said a few hours ago it was snowing and buses in Queen Anne were affected. Outside my window? No snow! Lies.

Anyhow, I'm broke, the economy is in the toilet, and I'm probably going to be out of a job in the next few weeks/months. I'm working on a new (well, a) budget and cutting out a bunch of shit. On the chopping block, cable tv, tivo, gym membership, and my parking space under my apartment. Staying in: internet, netflix, phone, power, and rent.

The big expensive: booze. I don't know the game plan on the booze situation, but something needs to be done. Being an alcoholic is expensive, especially in Washington state where they think making booze expensive will make people not be alcoholics, when in reality it simply makes alcoholics poor.

Ironically, for as much as I drink, my knowledge of good drinking deals are limited. Only a few weeks ago did I learn about Two Buck Chuck, which is allegedly a bottle of wine for around 2-4 dollars (depending on the state [meaning at least four bucks here]). I say allegedly because I can't comprehend that I can get a bottle of wine for four goddamn dollars. Not until I see it, buy it, and drink it, will I believe it. And that's not happening today because I'm broke. Too broke for Two Buck Chuck. Pennies to my name, son. But Two Buck Chuck might be the answer to my drinking problem.

If not, I still need to be more responsible with my drinking. No more blowing twenty bucks on a bottle of whiskey or a 12 pack of beer every night. Those days are over (until better economic times). It's time to get stingy. Drink responsibly and all.

Until the paycheck drops, I'm sober and pretty much confined to my apartment and wherever homeless people are allowed to roam. Luckily, I've bought a lot of shit over the years and can easily keep myself entertained for the next three days (my weekend is now, yes i'm cool). That means video games, and movies, and cleaning up my ridiculously dirty apartment. And blogging! Because blogging is free!

I also might go to the library later, although I have a lot of books I haven't read here and according to the library's online catalog pretty much everything cool is always checked out with a waiting list of 30 people.

And now I'm off to attempt to beat all the Legend of Zelda games I have in my possession. I will lose interest before long, but lets see how I do!

Thursday, January 1

Happy New Year's!

What fresh new Hell awaits us in the next 12 months?

Saturday, December 20

prequel

hello internet.